Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You pole danced in your parka.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
