ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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