What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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