Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
