'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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