K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
