writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Randomize
