How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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