Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
