I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
