found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
