How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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