Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
