It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
