ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
