My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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