Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
