I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
