I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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