Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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