He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
try to milk me bitch
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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