season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
third nipple confirmed
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
