even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
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