Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
When did angry sex become our thing?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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