she was so not down for the gang bang
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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