So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize