I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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