yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
