were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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