I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
