Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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