the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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