ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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