I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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