hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
that may or may not have been my penis.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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