I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize