Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
