Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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