I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
