don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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