All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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