Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I think I sprained my soul last night
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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