as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
