the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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