Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
