I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
My pussy is not your playground.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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