What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
