I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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