Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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