I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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