i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
